Home Entertainment Expendables 2 will be PG-13 and it's all Chuck Norris' fault

Expendables 2 will be PG-13 and it's all Chuck Norris' fault

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As has been thoroughly and scientifically proven over the last few years, there really is nothing that Chuck Norris can’t do. Now according to an interview he has done with Polish magazine Gazeta, he/his beard has even managed to scare all the naughty words out of a script.

 “In Expendables 2, there was a lot of vulgar dialogue in the screenplay. For this reason, many young people wouldn’t be able to watch this. But I don’t play in movies like this. Due to that I said I won’t be a part of that if the hardcore language is not erased. Producers accepted my conditions and the movie will be classified in the category of PG-13.”

Clearly those producers are familiar with his many feats of strength. I’d like to believe that when he gave them those conditions, they didn’t agree to it so much as he wrote the conditions on the sole of his right boot, and just roundhouse kicked it into their forebrains.

Sylvester Stallone has spoken to Harry over at AICN to confirm the rating:

“Harry, the film is fantastic with Van Damme turning in an inspired performance… Our final battle is one for the ages. The PG13 rumor is true, but before your readers pass judgement,  trust me when I say this film is LARGE in every way and  delivers on every level. This movie touches on many emotions which we want to share with the broadest audience possible, BUT, fear not, this Barbeque of Grand scale Ass Bashing will not leave anyone hungry…Sly”

There will already be more collective testosterone on screen than has probably ever been seen in human history, so personally I”m not too fazed having no Monkey Flapping swearwords in the Mountain Flying movie.

Last Updated: January 19, 2012

9 Comments

  1. 5,997,289 people were harmed in the making of this movie.

    And screw you Chuck Norris.

    Reply

  2. Justin Hess

    January 19, 2012 at 09:19

    I’m not sure what was funnier. The line about Chuck Norris roundhouse kicking his conditions into the producers brains, or Stallone saying, and I quote, “Van Damme turning in an inspired performance”

    Reply

    • Kervyn Cloete

      January 19, 2012 at 09:27

      Have you ever seen JCVD? I will never make fun of Van Damme’s lack of acting ability again. The guy gives a monologue in there that had me on the verge of tears, and for all the right reasons, I might add.

      Reply

      • Justin Hess

        January 19, 2012 at 09:42

        EX 2 (the hilarious attempt at abbreviating the film’s title) is a different kind of animal from JCVD, I’d say. JCVD  was a film that was a direct commentary on Van Damme’s downward spiral into being a parody of himself.

        EX 2, on the other hand, seems to hew closer to the sort of stuff we’ve seen Van Damme do as a norm, where he has hardly given or been asked to give Harrison Ford-level thesping

        Reply

  3. Tanith

    January 19, 2012 at 09:19

    Dead keen to see this cheesy schlock. Films like this are always good fun. Even in PG13.

    Reply

  4. Gavin Mannion

    January 19, 2012 at 10:08

    I’m glad Chuck is making this stand to be honest, I’m not a fan of movies swearing just for the hell of it. 

    Reply

  5. Christo Kruger

    January 20, 2012 at 08:15

    Well, after this bit of news, there is no doubt that it will suck. PG-13 for a movie with Sly, Ahnold and Bruce Willis? Fuck you Chuck Norris. 

    Reply

    • Kervyn Cloete

      January 20, 2012 at 09:14

      I think you meant to say, “Gosh darn it, Chuck Norris.”

      Reply

  6. Christo Kruger

    January 20, 2012 at 10:40

    Just saw this, and had to share.

    “Behind Chuck Norris’s beard, there is a giant crybaby who doesn’t like curse words.”
    What a pussy.

    Reply

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