It’s the 2013 Remake Prediction Game!

You can’t spell 2013 without remake when it comes to movies! We’re going to see the usual assortment of such films next year, from Robocop through to the Evil Dead. Here’s a list of potential such films, which might also make a few announcements next year in the revival game.

Crocodile Dundee

America is going to fall in love with Australia all over again we reckon, and it’ll be a second golden age for vegemite sandwiches, comedians with paradoxical names and of course, crusading bushwhackers.

Paul Hogan made the world fall in love with the ozzie master of knowing what a knife is, and you can bet your can of Fosters that Hollywood will be looking to capitalise on some Oz love once again.

The Never-ending Story

Y’know, you could just spend millions on creating an all new fantasy universe for kids in order to make a new summer popcorn film, or… You could buy the rights to a timeless classic and CGI the hell out of it instead!

Nothing is sacred in Hollywood, and you can rest unassured that sooner or later, we’ll be seeing Atreyu ride a badly animated Falkor thorugh Fantasia, presumably while Bastion reads an eBook version of the classic tale.

Escape from New York

Call me…ReSnake. Snake Plissken is a hard man to kill, and Kurt Russell needs steady work. Well that most likely won’t happen, as it’d be cheaper to film a remake of that first film, than to inject some HGH into Russell for Escape from Planet Earth.

And hey, when it comes to post-apocalyptic wastelands, Cape Town has an awesome film studio, you dig? After all, just look at Dredd for evidence of that.

Revenge of the nerds

The old school franchise has been through several development hells in the last couple of years alone, before it finally fell silent, but we’ve got a sneaking suspicion that we might soon hear the Kervyn laugh once again.

Think about, the ‘geek’ culture is at a high point right now, with shows based on material from comics and anime doing the rounds, while characters that embrace that culture are hitting network ratings high right now.

I hate you Big Bang Theory, I hate you so damn much. So combine that trend with another classic film, and you’ve got some quick cash on your hands. KaChinga!

Chariots of fire

You know the real reason why this film will be remade? Is it because we need something to life the human spirit? To motivate us to strive to be better people, physically and mentally?

Hell no! It’s so that Skrillex can rewub the iconic theme that originated from that film! In 3D!

Happy 2013 everybody!

 

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  • Rincethis

    C’mon, Kurt Russell rocks! I wonder why he wasn’t invited to the Expendables?

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Kervyn-Cloete/610830836 Kervyn Cloete

    They need to remake Zardoz. But they have to keep the red mankini, handlebar moustache and ponytail of course

    • http://twitter.com/NukuNukuDash Tracy

      And wearing the red mankini? I assume you don’t want them to keep Sean Connery?

    • http://twitter.com/blahsum James Francis

      There aren’t enough drugs in the world…

  • http://twitter.com/blahsum James Francis

    I watched both Crocodile Dundees a short while ago. Neither aged well…

  • Lourens Jordaan

    I want a remake of Highlander!!!

    • Tavi Drew

      I heard somewhere they were working on a script for one.