Home Rumour: Is this STAR WARS: EPISODE VII's plot?

Rumour: Is this STAR WARS: EPISODE VII's plot?

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As is par for the course, JJ Abrams’ mystery box for Star Wars: Episode VII has been nigh impenetrable. There have been a few brief peeks inside (those leaked set photos), but they really haven’t shed any significant amount of light on the highly anticipated/dreaded film’s story. Until now. Maybe.

Devin Faraci at Badass Digest has apparently got his hands on some version of maybe a portion of a script and has written up his thoughts on it. Now I have to point out this info has not officially confirmed by Disney/Lucasfilms in any way, shape or form, but I also have to point out that this is Devin Faraci at Badass Digest. They run a pretty tight ship over there, and are not in the habit of posting scoops unless the source has been vetted thoroughly.

We have seen the most reliable people fooled in the past about a story’s veracity, so take this with a pinch of salt. That being said, and despite the fact that Faraci is only speaking about the film’s opening and has intentionally worded his write-up so as not to blatantly give away any serious surprises but rather keep everything vague , a SPOILER WARNING is still very much in effect if you wanted to go into Episode VII completely fresh. Scroll down below this fan made poster for Episode VII if you want to read on.

fan-made-star-wars-episode-vii-poster-with-new-cast

Still here? Well, then were’s what Faraci had to say:

Imagine the standard Star Wars crawl, and when it ends the camera pans up to the stars. But instead of a spaceship zooming into frame we see… a hand! A severed hand, tumbling through space. A severed hand gripping a light saber.

That hand falls onto a desert planet, where it is discovered by characters who will be our heroes. One is Daisy Ridley. The other is John Boyega, who is playing someone trying to change his path in life (again, I’m keeping it vague here). They recognize the light saber as a Jedi relic and decide to return it to the proper people.

Their quest takes them off world, and they meet up with Han Solo and Chewbacca, who aren’t flying around in the Millenium Falcon anymore but are piloting… well, that could be a spoiler. I’ll leave it. Anyway, Han and Chewie recognize the light saber as Luke’s, and they say they haven’t seen their friend in thirty years, since the events of Return of the Jedi.

So begins a quest to find the missing Jedi Master. Meanwhile, on an ice planet, nefarious forces are building a super weapon, one capable of destroying not planets but entire solar systems…

Luke’s hand? There are already lots of people speculating that this is the hand that Vader cut off on Bespin’s Cloud City, but that opens up a series of questions. How did the hand get from Cloud City (which is in the planet’s atmosphere) into outer space? And once it got to outer space, how did it end up on the other side of the galaxy if that is Tattooine it landed on?

Some argue that this is in fact not the Cloud City hand, but that would then imply that somehow Luke had managed to get his other hand chopped off at some point. Is he just the clumsiest Jedi the galaxy has ever seen? Either way, whichever hand you believe it to be, how did it not burn up in the atmosphere when falling to the planet?

It’s tiny details like these that make me want to call bantha poodoo on this story. However, the rest of the story does line up with other rumblings we’ve been hearing, about John Boyega’s character’s motivations, Harrison Ford’s big central role in the film and how the script is a massive nod to Episode IV (replace falling hand with R2-D2, and missing Luke with captured Leia). Faraci also points out this last point, but specifically mentions that this may be an homage but not a copy. Not every ice or desert planet we see now, is one we’ve already seen in the past *nudge nudge wink wink*

And while Ford may be central to the plot, Faraci also goes on to mention though that he’s been hearing from insiders that it’s John Boyega that thoroughly owns this movie. After breaking out with Attack the Block, this will probably be the role that turns him into a bona fide big time movie star. Correction: action movie star, as Faraci says that he’s been hearing amazing things about the film’s action set pieces.

So what do you guys think? Does this sound legit? If so, are you in favour of the Episode IV throwback or do you find it lazy and cheesy? Or maybe you just wish that none of this is even happening and you would rather go back to actually watching the original trilogy all over again for the billionth time?

Last Updated: July 21, 2014

25 Comments

  1. Well if it is true, then he’ll really be needing this O_o

    Reply

    • Sith JJ

      July 21, 2014 at 10:55

      I didn’t even have to look at the handle to know you posted this, avo.
      It’s been too long since you’ve graced us with your impurities. (not necessarily a bad thing)

      Reply

      • Unavengedavo

        July 21, 2014 at 12:06

        I have left a couple of posts on LG when I can 😛

        Reply

  2. Alien Emperor Trevor

    July 21, 2014 at 09:49

    This made me giggle. Never mind the not burning up in atmosphere thing, which is so illogical it makes even me, the most tolerant of stupid things in movies, cringe. No… my first thought about hearing the hand was the opening of The Last Remake of Beau Geste where the narrator’s finger points on the map & creates a massive hole that the legionnaires fall into.

    Reply

    • Unavengedavo

      July 21, 2014 at 09:51

      The only way I could see the hand not burning up is if it was his mechanical hand O_o

      Reply

      • Alien Emperor Trevor

        July 21, 2014 at 09:52

        Still. And why wouldn’t the light saber burn up either? It’s just silly.

        Reply

        • Unavengedavo

          July 21, 2014 at 09:54

          Well I would suspect that the material the light saber is made out of should be able to handle intense heat; seeing as it has a high powered laser beam for a blade O_o

          Reply

          • Alien Emperor Trevor

            July 21, 2014 at 09:57

            And that’s all ignoring the fact that tiny floating space junk would just orbit the planet anyway without entering the atmosphere unless it was travelling really fast. MY BRAIN HURTS NOW.

            This is even worse than those moron scientists in Prometheus. Oh look at the pretty little snake thing, it must be friendly.

          • Alien Emperor Trevor

            July 21, 2014 at 10:04

            I’m going to call it now, the reason the impact also doesn’t destroy the stuff it because it’s made out of the super-metal… Indestrucabillium. Because they’re original that way.

          • Unavengedavo

            July 21, 2014 at 10:09

            Was going to say that if it traveled at high speed, the impact would most likely destroy it. But in the end they can always use the “the force works in mysterious ways” line to explain everything 😛

  3. Brady miaau

    July 21, 2014 at 11:19

    I have 90% of all Star Wars cannon books. Some of those are crap. For example, Shield of Lies is set around this far from Return of the Jedi, but the story, for me, lacks a certain charm.

    I hope they, know, stick to the cannon. Cause Luke Skywalker missing for 30 years throws away ALL the cannon.

    He marries Mara Jade and is central to some of the stories.

    The best plot would include Grand Admiral Thrawn and Captain Palleon, Timothy Zahn books. But those were set too close to Return of the Jedi (five years later) and would require some adjustement. Books were at the top of the New York times bestseller lists for months for a damn good reason.

    Reply

    • BacchusZA

      July 21, 2014 at 11:33

      None of the books are canon, unfortunately.

      The only canon so far as Star Wars is concerned is the movies (Episodes I – VI), and the Clone Wars animated series & movie, that’s it.

      None of the EU books & comics. None of the games, None of the fan generated stuff. Zip, zilch and nada.

      Lucas wiped the entire EU so far as canon is concerned, though some elements **may** be preserved and carried over to the new movies, but it’s not likely we’ll see much of that happening.

      Reply

      • Unavengedavo

        July 21, 2014 at 11:42

        But before anyone rages about this, they did it so that they can still surprise people with the movies instead of having people bitch and moan that it’s not what the books are like O_o

        Reply

        • Brady miaau

          July 21, 2014 at 12:28

          Yeah, yeah. I get you too.

          Do I have to like it?

          Reply

          • Unavengedavo

            July 21, 2014 at 12:30

            YES! Because Star Wars 😛

          • Brady miaau

            July 21, 2014 at 12:30

            Ok, ok. I love Star Wars.

            Are you sure it will be Star Wars?

        • BacchusZA

          July 22, 2014 at 08:09

          Yeah, that does make sense, though it’s a pity in certain respects. Mara Jade, Thrawn, The Yuzhon Vong War and so on are all *good*, and well loved by fans, for a reason, so it’d be a real pity if they couldn’t be incorporated in some way.

          That said though, the majority of EU content? The less said about how crap that is, the better, and the Disney/Lucas guys now have almost infinite freedom to tell an amazing story with the new movies.

          Reply

      • Brady miaau

        July 21, 2014 at 12:28

        All is cannon in my mind, because it is clear the authors of the different books worked on the same universe, i.e. when something big changed the other books reflected that change.

        But I take your point. grudgingly! 🙂

        Reply

        • Kervyn Cloete

          July 21, 2014 at 13:22

          Everybody thought it was cannon. Everybody besides George Lucas, who insisted that unless he was personally involved with it, it wasn’t cannon.

          So when the new movies were announced, Lucasfilm/Disney had to make a call. Either adopt Lucas’ view, in which case it’s only the 6 movies and the Clone Wars animated series that is canon, or take all of the EU as canon, but then have the problem that any movies they do will retread/conflict the stories already done in the books/comics/games, etc.

          They chose door no.1 and labelled all the existing EU stuff as Star Wars Legends ie. glorified fan fiction. However they acknowledge that some of the characters and stories that were created in the EU were so iconic, that it would be silly to completely discard them, and will rather “borrow” these elements to use in the new stories.

          Reply

          • Brady miaau

            July 21, 2014 at 13:47

            ah, thanks mate. Crappy choice, but if is my money, I would do the same

            edit* So character like Mara Jade, Thrawn and Talon Karrde may just make an appearance? Ok, still wait and see.

          • Kervyn Cloete

            July 21, 2014 at 15:41

            Yep, that’s exactly right. Lucasfilm didn’t want to lay out things specifically, but said that there’s a chance that some characters may be popping up down the line in some form or another.

  4. Lourens Corleone

    July 21, 2014 at 11:22

    Moses! Jedi!

    Reply

  5. Sir Rants A Lot Llew

    July 22, 2014 at 13:56

    I’m fine with this. Sounds like the Sun Crusher. What bugs me was the footage they released showing an “X-Wing” that really isn’t an X-Wing but a design taken from the Z95 Headhunter. *grumbles something about I know my Star Wars ships and now they are screwing with that knowledge*

    Reply

  6. sope

    January 6, 2015 at 13:47

    Poster is horrid and so awfully wrong with their roles its beyond hilarious.

    Reply

    • Kervyn Cloete

      January 6, 2015 at 15:16

      That was a fan-created poster (as I mentioned in the article), created by just splicing together existing images of the actors. Remember, this post was from way before the cast’s roles or the movie’s trailer had been revealed. At this stage, we knew next to nothing.

      Reply

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